The Chaos Before the Storm: Facing Change

When facing times of difficulty, stress, and change it is easy to lose sight of truth. We start to allow our problems to outshadow God's strength. I have not written a post recently because I am facing a storm and not only am I struggling to find something uplifting to say, but I am personally struggling at clinging to truth. I am a wife preparing for her husband's deployment and I recently read that the few weeks leading up to the deployment are sometimes harder than the deployment itself, essentially, that the anticipation of difficulty ahead sometimes causes more stess than the actual situation. This is due to a number of factors:

1. Overwhelming Circumstances- the anticipation of a storm is an extremely busy and stressful time. For us it has involved packing, storing our belongings, and moving. Also, Jon has long hours of training each day, so even our last little bit of time together is spent very much apart. When facing stress, even attempts to relax seem to fall short because there is a heaviness of heart that you cannot lift alone.
2. Relational Stress- when facing stress it is that much easier to become short-tempered and emotional. In other words, you cannot help but stress the small stuff. When we do this, those closest to us feel the brunt of it. Jon and I find ourselves bickering over the littlest things; I have heard this is a subconcious attempt to prepare our hearts for the pending separation, but the last thing on earth we want to be doing is fighting. When facing a storm it is easy to alienate those closest to us. We become so focused on our own problems that we forget we are not the only ones in pain. When we do this we push away those we need most.
3. Change Itself- my mother recently said that "change is never easy, you always lose something." There is so much truth in that statement. With change also comes the uncertanty of the future. This is both circumstantial and personal- what will happen and who will I become? So not only do you experience loss, but you feel lost!

I share this because I want to offer some words of truth, as a reminder to myself, but also as an attempt to encourage others facing a similar situation, whether it is deployment, loss, change, or just stress.

"You will keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in you." - Isaiah 26:3 (ESV)

With that in mind, here are some ways to be "stayed":

1. Stay in the Word- "Sanctify them in the truth, Your word is truth" (John 17:17). In order to keep ourselves focused on truth, we have to know God's Word and His promises. The Holy Spirit illuminates, reminds, and comforts us, but in order to do this He needs some truth to work with. No matter how busy or stressful things get we have to prioritize time in the Word to meditate on God's truths. 

2. Stay healthy- "Elijah was afraid and ran for his life. When he came to Beersheba in Judah, he left his servant there, while he himself went a day's journey into the wilderness. He came to a broom bush, sat down under it and prayed that he might die. 'I have had enough, LORD,' he said. 'Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.' Then he lay down under the bush and fell asleep. All at once an angel touched him and said, 'Get up and eat.' He looked around, and there by his head was some bread baked over hot coals, and a jar of water. He ate and drank and then lay down again. The angel of the LORD came back a second time and touched him and said, 'Get up and eat, for the journey is too much for you.' So he got up and ate and drank." (1 Kings 19:3-8a NIV). 

Sometimes what we need is just plain physical nourishment. Get some sleep! Eat healthy and stay active. Our minds will not stay in a healthy place if our bodies are all out of whack. 

3. Stay connected- "Then the LORD God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him'" (Gen. 2:18). The only thing in God's creation that He calls "not good" is when man is alone. God is a God of community and He designed us to be in community. That is why it is so important not to let our stress and self-centered focus aleinate us from those we need most when we need them most. We must keep up good communication with our spouse, and utilize the  support of friends and family. Do not be afraid to ask for help, it may be just a phone call away.

4. Stay hopeful- "Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come" (Prov. 31:25). Rather than being anxious about the uncertainty ahead, we can smile in hopefullness at the future because God is good. He has a purpose and a plan and will not abandon us. He is using the difficulty to produce greater holiness and trust. "For momentary, light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison" (2 Cor. 4:17). 

1. Image taken from dora4yiu.wordpress.com